Hard Choices

“Then they came to a place named Gethsemane, and He told His disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” He took Peter, James, and John with Him, and He began to be deeply distressed and horrified. Then He said to them, “My soul is swallowed up in sorrow — to the point of death. Remain here and stay awake.” Then He went a little farther, fell to the ground, and began to pray that if it were possible, the hour might pass from Him. And He said, “Abba, Father! All things are possible for You. Take this cup away from Me. Nevertheless, not what I will, but what You will.”” (Mark 14:32-36 HCSB)

When I was a kid, my older brother, Jerry, was my protector. He was always much, much tougher than I was. There were several bullies who lived in our neighborhood and they loved to pick on and torment me. I would run and hide but Jerry would stand and fight. If Jerry was around, I wasn’t afraid because I knew he would and could protect me from them. I’m an old man now, but I still look up to my older brother and I fondly remember those days when he stood up and took on the fight that I was incapable of winning.

In this week’s focal passage, we encounter a story that is dark and difficult to fully understand. Like much of scripture, we read it and we understand the facts and the simple story line but we don’t stop and let the words settle into our soul and expose our fears and struggles. We hear it, but we aren’t listening to it. Really listening to what it says. In many ways, this is the story of our older brother, Jesus, stepping into the fight, taking the blows and letting us walk away unscathed.

As Jesus and the disciples leave the upper room, He leads them to a place called Gethsemane. The word Gethsemane means “olive press” and it is a quiet, solitary place where Jesus loved to come and pray. It seems that Judas uses this chance to slip away into the shadows as he sought an opportunity to betray Jesus. We are not entirely sure when and where this happens, but it would seem that Gethsemane is the perfect opportunity. Jesus has stationed nine of the disciples at the entrance and then takes Peter, James and John further into the garden with Him. I believe Judas uses this opportunity to slip away and alert the Sanhedrin as to His location and an opportunity to arrest Jesus away from the crowds.

As Jesus takes Peter, James and John deeper into the garden, Mark tells us that He becomes deeply distressed and horrified. We don’t often associate those emotions with this man who seems to stare evil in the eye and overpowers it with just His word. Yet, Mark even quotes Jesus as saying, “My soul is swallowed up in sorrow – to the point of death.” The words translated as “deeply distressed and horrified” carry a very strong sense of emotional distress and struggle. One word deals with sorrow and the other with fear. To put it simply, Jesus is overwhelmed with sorrow, heaviness, distress and fear. Let that sink in, a bit. The Son of God is overwhelmed with these emotions as the weight of man’s sin begins to crush Him as He kneels to pray in Gethsemane – the olive press.

I think it is important for us to understand the source and the depth of these feelings. While Jesus knows He is facing imminent death, I am certain that His impending death is NOT the source or cause of these intense emotions. But before we get to what I think is the cause, I want you to note what He does – He asks Peter, James and John to wait nearby and to stay awake while He prays. He wants His closest associates to remain awake, watchful and alert while He agonizes in prayer over these things. He needs them to be on over watch while He is in prayer. They are to watch and hold the perimeter while He is engaged in spiritual battle through prayer.

Pay close attention to what Jesus does: “falling to the ground, He began to pray that if it were possible, “the hour” might pass from Him.” Not a literal hour, but this period of time in which God’s will and divine purpose is most focused and at stake. There is an epic fight ensuing, a cosmic spiritual battle raging in this garden as the world slumbers in blissful peace. Satan knows that if He can win this fight, the battle is over. All of God’s plan hinges on this moment and Satan knows it and he is throwing everything he has at Jesus, right now! What does Jesus do? He goes to His Father in prayer.

Why prayer? Why now? Because that’s where this battle will be decided. This fight, this epic battle is a battle of wills – God’s or man’s. This story is where we see Jesus’ divinity and His humanity most clearly. God has taken on flesh, He has become a man and the battle against sin has come down to this hour, this moment, this decision. Can Jesus, the God-man overcome the greatest challenge He will ever face? Let’s listen in…

“Abba, Father! All things are possible for You. Take this cup away from Me.”

Jesus is NOT overwhelmed with the fear of human death. He is overwhelmed with “this cup.” This cup is referencing the cup of God’s wrath against the sins of all mankind and, more specifically, God’s plan of redemption through Jesus taking on that sin and receiving God’s wrath and judgment for sin. That is the cup that God has given Him to drink. God is going to crush Jesus because of our sin and rebellion.

“But He was pierced because of our transgressions, crushed because of our iniquities; punishment for our peace was on Him, and we are healed by His wounds. We all went astray like sheep; we all have turned to our own way; and the Lord has punished Him for the iniquity of us all. He was oppressed and afflicted, yet He did not open His mouth. Like a lamb led to the slaughter and like a sheep silent before her shearers, He did not open His mouth. He was taken away because of oppression and judgment; and who considered His fate? For He was cut off from the land of the living; He was struck because of my people’s rebellion. They made His grave with the wicked and with a rich man at His death, although He had done no violence and had not spoken deceitfully. Yet the Lord was pleased to crush Him severely. When You make Him a restitution offering, He will see His seed, He will prolong His days, and by His hand, the Lord’s pleasure will be accomplished.” (Isaiah 53:5-10 HCSB)

While this was the battle Jesus faced, it is also the battle all of us face. The battle between our will and God’s will. There are two things I want you to note in Jesus’ prayer. First, His prayer is directed to His Abba, His Father. It is more akin to my use of the word, Dad, when I refer to my earthly father. It is a much more intimate, personal and endearing term than father. Jesus isn’t just talking to “the man upstairs” or the “great spirit in the sky” or some unknown, unseen cosmic spiritual force. In fact, He’s not even just talking to God. He is talking to His Dad, who knows Him intimately, loves Him deeply and whom He trusts implicitly.

Next, He acknowledges that “all things are possible” for God. God has the ability to do whatever He chooses or wills. He has the ability to take “this cup” away from Jesus. The question here is not about God’s ability to do this, but about His will. Jesus says, “Father, I know you can take this cup away and that’s what I desire. Nevertheless, not what I will, but what You will.”

Don’t miss this, when God chose to reveal Himself to man He did so with His personal name – YHWH. He is not some impersonal force or distant god that cannot be known, understood or related to. God wants us to know Him, to call Him by name and to relate to Him on an intimate level. He desires more than abstract veneration, empty words, rote prayers or ritual worship, He desires relationship. He wants to know you and to be known by you.

That’s an important factor in how Jesus prayed and whether He would surrender to God’s will. He may want to avoid God’s will (the hour, this cup) but He knows He can trust His Abba. It is also an important factor in how we ought to pray and whether we are willing to submit ourselves to His will. Do you trust Him enough to surrender your will to His?

Ultimately, that’s what this all comes down to. Will you surrender to God’s will in the same way that Jesus surrendered to it. Are you willing to seek to know God well enough that you trust His heart and, thus, surrender to His will? Jesus knew His Father could remove the cup, but He also knew His Father’s heart. He chose to trust His Abba’s heart and surrender His own will to His Abba’s will and drink the cup of God’s wrath for man’s sin.

I think we often approach God like this: “God, I’ll believe you and follow you if You’ll do what I want or ask.” However, if we truly desire and seek to know our Father God, then we will trust Him and seek to follow His will. Hopefully, our prayers will begin to sound more like Jesus’ prayers: “Dad, I know you can do anything. While I want you to remove this cup, I trust you enough to follow You and obey You even when it takes me to places I don’t like, puts me in situations I don’t desire and brings pain I’d rather avoid. I trust Your heart and I surrender Myself to Your will.”

These are hard choices, surrendering your will to God’s will, but they are made less hard when we know God well enough to trust His heart. Do you know Him that well? If not, you can.

I started out today talking about my brother protecting and defending me when I was a kid. He did, and I am so thankful that he did. But I have someone else who is even bigger, greater and more capable of protecting me, Almighty God. He has promised to hold me in the palm of His hand and never let me go. I am not worthy of His love and protection, but He’s my Abba. In His infinite wisdom, He devised a plan whereby I could be redeemed from the sin that ruled and ruined my life. His Son, Jesus, was the one who would bear my sin and take my punishment. I’m so glad Jesus chose His Father’s will over His own.

Now, you and I face the same daily struggle to surrender our will and choose God’s will. While we’re not sure about where He will take us, we can rest assured we can trust His heart. I hope you’ll join me on this journey of walking with God and surrendering to His will. It’s a hard choice, but it’s one you won’t regret making.